Turnabout Travellers
by demonprosecutor
Summary: A long story in short chapters about Phoenix, Edgeworth, Maya, Gumshoe, Larry and Pearl going on holiday to Wales... May include SPOILERS for all 3 PW games.
1. Chapter 1

Phoenix felt dizzy as he came stumbled down the steps to earth again. He had never been one for planes, especially nine hour flights.

'Why the hell did I let you drag me all the way to Wales?' he muttered to Maya, who was breathing in the country air with a smile. They hadn't actually left the airport, but it was better than an office in the middle of the city.

'I think the question is more why did _I _let her drag me all the way to Wales,' muttered Miles, 'She's you're assistant, not mine.'

'I've told you before! We all needed a break from murder and crime, so, why not take that break together?' replied Maya, beaming.

'I can tell you why,' complained Miles, 'It's because…'

'Oh come on, Edgey, you can tell she meant well. And it was worth it to reunite us three again. And Trench Coat Guy and Magic Kid,' laughed Larry. Maya had gone too far this time.

She had only gone and booked a week's holiday for six in Wales and forced Phoenix, Detective Gumshoe, Larry Butz, Pearl and – for some mysterious reason – Miles Edgeworth to come along. Pearl took no persuading whatsoever, but in the end Maya had to drag Miles from his office, ignoring his screams of, 'I'll call the police,' and, 'I'll get a restraining order on you!'

But, in the end, he reluctantly went. One week in Wales, with two of the greatest rivals ever sharing the same country cottage; would they be able to get through this without going mad? Only time would tell.

The plane journey alone had been havoc. Detective Gumshoe lost his passport, Maya forgot which flight they were on, Larry got in trouble for being an illegal immigrant (that took a long time to sort out), Pearl got confused about how airports and planes worked and nearly checked her self in as luggage, and Phoenix and Edgeworth were constantly arguing about seating arrangements.

And that was before they got on the plane.

I'm not going to describe the flight in all the gory details, but it ended up with Maya being told that she was never allowed to fly with that airline again, and Miles crying into the back of the seat in front of him saying, 'Why me? Why did the Lord pick me to smite with this stupid holiday?'

After two confusing hours, when they had managed to get the correct luggage and explain that Larry wasn't an illegal immigrant again, the six travellers ended up at the car rental car park. Unfortunately, all the numbers had rubbed off, so they would need to count to which car was theirs. Their car number; 248.

'96, 97, 98…hang on, I think I missed one. Let's start again,' decided Maya for the eighth time.

'Why don't you let _me _do it? I'm better with numbers,' suggested Pearl.

'That's ridiculous – The eight year old girl can't be the best with numbers when we have two lawyers and a detective with us,' objected Miles.

'And a spirit medium!' Maya reminded him, 'and a hot dog seller – we can't forget Larry.'

'Yeah! We can't forget me! I bet you couldn't sell Samurai Dogs all through winter, rain, wind and snow!'

Miles just stared at him for a few moments before replying.

'Don't ever talk to me again. If anyone asks, I don't know you.'

Finally, they found the hire car. A run-down minibus.

'Why a minibus?' asked Phoenix.

'Why not a minibus?' asked Maya, 'if you can only get five in a normal car, and a seven seater never comes in your favourite colour, then you may as well get a mini bus. That way, we can get all of our suitcases in and not have to sit by each other!'

'You've got to admire her logic, Phoenix. Apart from the favourite colour bit. I'm not exactly fond of having to drive around in a pink and purple minibus with 'Spirit Mediums on Tour' written on the side,' Miles pointed out.

'Only two of us are even spirit mediums. Why not 'Lawyers on Tour' instead?' said Phoenix.

'Or 'Detectives on Tour''

'Samurai dog Sellers on Tour!!'

'I think I should have just got a classy yet discreet black Bentley, and you could have all gone in the minibus while I took that.'

'Stop being such a spoilsport, Edgeworth! Nick, make him stop!!'

'Um…stop?'

They went on like this for roughly thirty minutes, until Pearl pointed out that there was no point arguing over it, so why didn't they all shut up and decide who would drive.

'How are we meant to shut up _and _decide who's going to drive?' asked Larry.

Pearl sighed and handed the keys to Miles, therefore giving her views.

'Why me? Why can't Phoenix drive?'

'I don't have a licence.'

'Detective?'

'They took mine away.'

'Maya?'

'I don't understand cars at the simplest times, so driving on the other side of the road – it wouldn't be easy. And I don't have a licence.'

'Larry?'

'I never passed the test. They said I was to dumb to drive.'

'And…I can't believe I'm saying this…Pearl?'

'I'm eight.'

So Miles ended up driving.

The conversation in the mini-bus was scarce, and even then not very friendly. In fact, the longest conversation ended up with a clump of Maya's hair being pulled out and Larry nearly being thrown out of the window. Then they arrived – finally.


	2. Chapter 2

The little house was being rented to Maya by a Welsh guy who had gone away from a week – that's all she knew, no name, no details, nothing. It was up in the hills, and the nearest shop was forty five minutes drive away.

As they drove in and parked the car, Maya turned round.

'I have an announcement to make. There are only two bedrooms. One has just two beds, one has two beds and a hammock for some reason, and someone's going to have to sleep on the sofa. Sorry.'

'I'll sleep on the sofa. I'm used to it – I actually prefer it to beds now.'

'Thank you, Mr Scruffy Detective Man. I suppose this means that Mystic Maya and I should have the room with only two beds, and you three can work out who's going to have the hammock.'

'I agree with Pearly. Come on, then, let's go and unpack while the boys decide who's going to sleep on that hammock!'

They ran into the house, giggling. Miles sat down on a bench, his head in hands, muttering, 'I can't do this. I just can't do it.'

'Well, Edgey's in shock, so we'll just leave him to it. It looks like it's just you and me to vote, Phoenix. I say Edgey,' grinned Larry with a thumbs-up.

But Phoenix, the justice-freak, said that wasn't fair, so he came up with a rota on Miles's laptop while Larry distracted him, and printed it off with Miles's portable printer. He was the only one who had things like this – the others travelled light, AKA, they didn't have salaries like the second-to-chief Prosecutor's.

The house was…not perfect. There was no electricity. The bathroom was outdoors. The rooms were tiny. It was kind of…out of date.

Phoenix was first on the hammock. It was already nine when the got in, so when everything was unpacked, Larry called for a pizza, ignoring the fact that everyone was yelling that it would take an hour to get here.

'I only got one, so only about three of us will get any,' he argued, 'which will be me, Phoenix and Edgey, so we won't wake any of you lot. And I'm used to all nighters, Phoenix will probably stay awake the first night because he's scared of strange places, and I think Edgey's a vampire anyway, so no problems there. We can have a midnight feast.'

The girls were asleep, which had taken about ten minutes, and Miles had set Gumshoe outside watching for the pizza man (just to see if he'd actually do it). Phoenix was playing on his DS and Miles was reading a book. Surreptitiously, Larry rolled out of bed on purpose, landing on the floor with a bang – Phoenix glanced over slightly, Miles just ignored him – crawled over to the pile of three suitcases, opened the orange one on the top and pulled out a portable television.

He turned it on, and for a moment there was a blaring noise. He quickly put it on mute. Phoenix glanced up for a moment. Miles just ignored him.

For the next half hour, Larry sat cross legged on the floor watching a Silver Samurai Special re-run, while Phoenix and Miles just carried on reading and DS-ing.

Then, suddenly, Larry spoke up.

'Hey, guys. There's something on that might be interesting to two workaholic lawyers.'

'What?' asked Phoenix, glancing up for a moment. Miles just ignored him again – it was the safest way to deal with Larry.

'I'll turn it up slightly.'

'…the murder took place at this church in Brecon. A witness, Milo Edgeworth, saw the murder and confirms that it was indeed, Rex Stott.'

'MILO!?' yelled Miles, sitting up suddenly, this sudden outburst causing Phoenix to send his DS flying.

'Hey, Milo Edgeworth…Miles Edgeworth…there's something about those two names, I just can't put my finger on it,' said Larry, thinking hard.

'That's my brother! I haven't seen him for seventeen years…ever since that incident…'

That incident. The DL-6 case had closed two years ago. The case where Malcolm Von Karma killed Gregory Edgeworth…before his nine year old son's very eyes.

Well, kind of, since Miles had been unconscious at the time due to lack of air.

A lot of terrible things had come out of that case, including Miles's own trial. Phoenix shuddered at the thought of it. When Yanni Yogi killed his lawyer from fifteen years ago then blamed Miles. The hardest case Phoenix had ever had to solve, probably.

And now a mysterious brother who disappeared at the time? DL-6 never stopped surprising. It surprised Phoenix so much that it had stopped being surprising now.

The next ten minutes was spent writing down notes on the murder. Another case would definitely brighten up the week – in a way. And then…there was a problem.

'What about Maya?' Phoenix pointed out.

'What about her?' said Edgeworth, searching his suitcase for a photo-album he always carried with him.

'Well, she's not going to let either of us take on any cases when we're on vacation.'

'So? We just won't tell her. When it's time to investigate or go to court, we'll just say we're going somewhere. Like for a walk. That she can't come on – with Larry, we'll have to take Larry. We can't leave him on his own, to tell Maya. You know how hard he finds having to shut his mouth.'

There was a knock on the door. Larry screamed.

'Erm, sorry. Is this a bad time, only I've got your pizza?' laughed Gumshoe, putting his head round the door.

He put the pizza down on the nearest bed, and left the room, still laughing.

'OK, guys, let's tuck in!' said Larry, grinning.

'I don't eat while I work. It distracts,' muttered Miles.

'Since when were you working?'

'Since I saw the news just now. I need to make a phone call.'

'Hang on,' Phoenix pointed out, 'Isn't it a bit weird to make phone calls at 11pm?'

'I think that phoning your brother who you haven't seen for seventeen years when he's just appeared on the News as a witness to a murder of a somewhat familiar name might just be an exception.'

'Somewhat familiar name?'

'Every name mentioned there was someone that I remember. But I can't remember what for…something to with _that day_, but I lost my memory of _that day_, didn't I?' he said, half to himself.

Phoenix and Larry watched intently as he made the phone call. They had nothing better to do, after all, apart from eat pizza, which Larry did at the same time, and at the end of the conversation he had already finished off half of it. On his own. And this was a family sized pizza.

BEEP. He hung up the phone.

'He pretended he didn't know who I was.'

'Wow,' said Larry between mouthfuls, 'that's pretty low.'

'So, what are we going to do?' asked Phoenix.

'We?'

'Don't think we're going to let you do this on your own!'

'Well, I, for one, am going to take on this case first thing tomorrow morning. If you do the same, then we'll end up against each other.'

'It won't be the first time we've worked together on different sides. Remember the Engarde case?'

'That was different. There was something in it for both of us.'

'What!?'

Miles explained that the Engarde case was the first rung on the ladder back to being a proper prosecutor again. It had mostly been because of Maya, but there had been something in there for him.

'You heartless, ruthless…' Larry began before Phoenix butted in, saying he didn't mind, and that he'd known all along anyway. Of course, he hadn't, but still, it made him look smart.

No-one in that bedroom slept a wink that night. This was mostly because Miles kept making phone calls, but also because Phoenix was working on the case and Larry found a good movie on TV.

But of course, in the morning they were all really cranky. When you're really cranky, the last person you want to talk to is Maya.

'Hiya boys!!' she beamed, flinging the door open. It was five am, and Phoenix, Larry and Miles were just going to sleep.

'Go away, Maya,' muttered Phoenix, shoving a pillow over his head to block out to sound of Gumshoe singing from the kitchen. Gumshoe always sang while he cooked, and he was making breakfast. Loudly.

'Can't do that, Nick! Right after breakfast, which is in five minutes, we're going out for a walk in the hills! And you're coming! So get up and get ready…hang on, you already are ready…eh?' she said, scratching her head as she noticed that Phoenix and Miles were still in the suits that they always wore, and Larry was still wearing his orange jacket, stained white and green T-shirt and faded black trousers.

'Oops,' Phoenix mumbled unenthusiastically from under the pillow, 'in the confusion of last night we must have forgotten to get into our pyjamas.'

'Confusion? Were you having a pillow fight? Pearl and I were having a pillow fight!! It rocked! We let Gumshoe come in to join us, and pretty soon, there were feathers and chocolate sauce everywhere!'

There was silence for a moment, until the previously silent Larry – that made a change – spoke up.

'Where did you get the chocolate sauce?'

'Gumshoe brought it, but there's none left,' the spirit medium giggled.

'… You sly little…'

'Larry, it's just chocolate sauce. Don't worry, I'm sure we can get some more,' Phoenix butted in again, removing the pillow to make himself heard.

'Would everyone just shut up?' groaned a muffled voice from under Miles's duvet.

'Fine. If you three are going to use that attitude, Pearl, Gumshoe and I will have two helpings of breakfast _each_, leaving _zilch _helpings for you lot.'

With that, she stormed out of the room.

There was silence. It wasn't going to last.

'Oh, come on, guys!'

The demon spirit-medium had returned. As usual, her unwavering mind had been made up. They were getting up and going for a walk. Now.


	3. Chapter 3

Breakfast was a disaster. Larry threw up after eating the cremated mush Gumshoe served him, Miles just stared at it half-heartedly for half an hour, and Phoenix fell asleep in it. They were beginning to wonder if it would have been better to _not _have stayed up all night phoning people and messing around on laptops.

After that came the dreaded walk.

The walking wasn't so bad. They could just lag behind and pretend they were somewhere else. The worst part was the singing.

The travellers had been split into two groups. One was the holiday-ers. That was Maya, Pearl and Gumshoe, who weren't taking anything seriously and were happy to get ridiculously small amounts of sleep.

The other was the Business Men. Phoenix, Miles and surprisingly Larry had their minds on the new case that had popped up, and didn't seem to appreciate all-nighters as much as seemed to be expected of two lawyers and a Samurai Dog seller.

The latter just lagged behind and muttered about there secret mission within the group and within the group _only. _The former skipped ahead, singing and laughing and on the whole having a brilliant day. The latter hated the former.

The moral of the coming paragraphs is, 'Be prepared, you never know who you're going to bang into when walking in a small village in Wales. Wear whip-proof jackets.'

They had just come to a village, a small one with a few classic village shops and cottages. Maya was arguing with a man in a sweet shop who only spoke Welsh, Pearl was playing with her ball and Gumshoe was accidentally terrifying the local children.

Phoenix, Miles and Larry collapsed onto a bench and closed their eyes. Finally, a chance to rest, not only from the walking but from the singing. When suddenly…

'Aaaargh!!'

Larry fell off the bench as a whip cracked. A very familiar whip, which had cracked many times before, both in and out of court.

Phoenix and Miles didn't bother to open their eyes. There was no need. The whip said it all. Somehow, they had managed to bang into Franziska Von Karma while on a holiday to Wales.

'What are you three foolish fools doing here?' she hissed.

'Actually, it's _six _foolish fools. And I haven't got a clue what we're doing here. It's something to do with Maya dragging us onto a plane, threatening us with death,' Phoenix muttered, half asleep.

'And you?' she said, cracking the whip at Miles.

'Maya,' he answered unexcitedly.

'Ditto here,' Larry added.

A confused Franziska stared at them, her mouth slightly open, the whip hanging loosely at her side. The two people she most hated where just sitting there, in a village in Wales, after being dragged there from America by a childish spirit medium. When she had seen them, she had expected the usual cruel, cold Miles Edgeworth and the paranoid yet determined and objection-yelling Phoenix Wright that she knew so well. But these two people who she was now encountering were careless and wouldn't even have noticed if they were witnessing a murder, let alone be able to work out the truth of one with only a few shreds of evidence.

'Um…well…yes. Well…I'll see you around…maybe,' she stuttered, backing off.

'Hey, why don't you stay a bit? We can talk about all the cases I won against you,' Phoenix muttered.

She let out a scream of rage, and ran to a fancy black car, yelling something to her chauffer in German as she slammed the door. It drove off into the distance, taking Franziska Von Karma away from the little Welsh village forever.

'Larry, go tell the villagers that they can live there lives in peace now,' Phoenix said calmly, 'She's gone from here forever.'

'Don't bother,' sighed Miles, half opening his eyes, 'She'll be back sooner than you think.'

'Eh?'

Miles pointed to the object lying next to Larry, who hadn't bothered to get up yet. Phoenix and Larry decided to bother themselves with looking at it, and then groaned as they wished they hadn't. Franziska's whip; she must have dropped it in her hurry to get away.

This meant that she'd probably already be on her way back. they had two choices; one, wait there and face another whipping, or two, carry on walking to there next destination. Neither appealed to the three men who had had no sleep whatsoever and knew they weren't going to get any for a long time, but one would definitely be less painful than the other, and at least the walk would speed up.

As they walked along behind the singing spirit mediums and detective, Larry suddenly stopped, his mouth open wide, his eyes wide awake instead of half closed and almost unseeing.

'What is it, Larry?' asked Phoenix with a sigh.

'…em…er…guys?'

'I'll look,' murmured Miles, shaking his head as he turned around to look at what Larry was pointing at.

'OH MY GOD!!' he yelled, almost falling backwards, 'Larry, you genius!'

'What the hell is up with… is that…is that…' he trailed off as he saw the white church on a hill in the distance. It was fairly far away, but they could see the tape around the building, almost certain that it would say 'crime scene' when they got up close. The church yard was swarming with police, or they were probably police from what the three men could see, and there were definitely police cars parked outside.

'Do you think it's the one?' Larry whispered, 'Do you think it's the church where Rex Stott killed his dad?'

'Hang, that hasn't been proved yet!' said Phoenix, in a shocked voice.

'Oh, come on. My brother saw it, that other un-named witness saw it, and there was evidence. How much more proof do you want?' snapped Miles.

'Hey, slowcoaches! Are you coming or what?' yelled Maya.

'Hey, here's an idea!' Phoenix yelled back, 'How about you guys and us guys head off to different destinations, so you go to that lake and we go to, say…a church, maybe?'

'And then we can compare what we've seen at the end of the day!' Miles added.

Maya shrugged, 'Ok. Just don't go off home. I'll know if you do.'

They waited until the others were out of sight, then Miles grabbed his mobile phone, dialled in a number and held it to his ear, walking round to find the best reception he could get.

When he hung up, he walked back over to Phoenix and Larry, slipping the phone back into the inside pocket of his jacket.

'That was a car rental company,' he explained, 'they do the most excellent service where they drive the selected car over and leave it with you. I've just asked for a four-wheel-drive so we can get there faster.'

'Yeah, apart from the several hours it will take for them to get here,' muttered Larry, sitting down on a rock and putting his head in his hands.

'I've also asked for them to bring it in a helicopter so it gets here faster.'

Larry fell off his rock.

'Wow! You have more cash than I thought you did!'

'Miles, isn't that a bit eccentric? Usually you're so logical!' said Phoenix.

'Desperate times call for desperate measures. We need to get over to that church fast if we're going to get this case, but we need to arrive without being noticed, and a helicopter all the way would be noticed, but a helicopter up to here would be fine, and a car from here to there would be fine. See, I am being logical.'

'I guess it depends what your thoughts on logic are, hey?' said a baffled Larry.

They sat there for ten minutes discussing logic as Larry made daisy chains and Miles yelled at Phoenix because he'd left his binoculars in his suitcase and brought his hair gel instead. Phoenix defended himself, saying that you never know when you might have a hair disaster and he preferred to be prepared so that his spikes were always prefect.

Finally the helicopter arrived, and a dark blue Ford Ranger in prefect condition was driven down a ramp. A man in blue overalls got out of the car.

'Mr Edgeworth?'

Miles signed for the car, entered his pin-code into the Chip & Pin machine and received the keys.

Soon they were driving over the bumpy heather-covered hills, with Larry, who was sitting in the backseat, sticking his head out of the window like a dog. His job was to keep an eye on the church so that Miles didn't go off in the complete wrong direction.

'Left a bit…Right a bit…ok, now after that tree, just go straight on and stop at the big rock.'

'Which tree?'

'The big one with the leaves.' He pointed at the chosen tree.

'Oh, right.'

When they stopped at the big rock, Larry suggested they walk the rest so as not to be spotted by the police.

Having gotten over the shock of Larry having a good idea, the three men walked up the hill to the church on the top. Keeping there eyes pealed for approaching policemen, they snuck under the crime-scene tape and into the church.

It was obviously lunch-break, as the church was empty. Miles assigned everyone to their roles; Larry was put on guard, Phoenix would search the whole church for clues, and Miles gave himself the most important job, searching the area around where the body was actually found.

The first thing was pretty obvious. A few benches back from the body, a jacket was hanging from the corner of the bench. Phoenix walked over to the jacket, and suddenly gave a yell of surprise.

'Guys, this jacket is covered with blood!'

Miles glanced up from examining the area where the body was found, which so far seemed normal, and raised his eyebrows.

'That must be either the victim's or the killer's jacket, then.'

'I doubt it's the victim's. It's more splattered, not covered.'

'Yeah, it probably is the killer's,' Larry interrupted, 'He's wearing it in this picture.'

'WHAT?!' exclaimed Phoenix and Miles simultaneously.

Phoenix ran over and grabbed the card Larry was holding, and examined it closely. Larry peeked over his shoulder, pleased at finding something important.

It was a passport, and the person it belonged to was indeed Rex Stott. He was wearing a black demin jacket with four pockets and silver buttons, each with what looked like a family crest engraved into it. It was definitely the same jacket.

From the picture Phoenix could guess that Rex was a very casual person who didn't listen to, or didn't understand, a lot of things people said to him, seeing as he was smiling, slouching slightly, and raising a hand as if waving. Three things you aren't meant to do while having a passport photo taken.

He had black hair with purple highlights that flopped over his face slightly, but didn't cover his eye. Phoenix thanked God for this; otherwise he would probably have ended up with another Engarde. He didn't appreciate it when his client turned evil.

According to the passport, Rex was nineteen. He was from Manchester, but lived in Wales. As Phoenix flicked through the passport, he realised that Rex was very well-travelled. He'd been everywhere; America, Spain, Portugal, China; _all_ _these holidays must cost even more than Frilly Prosecutor here can earn, _thought Phoenix.

'So…err…yeah, so, what is it?' asked Larry with a weak smile, 'will it help our defence, dude?'

'You're quick to choose your side,' said Miles, a bitter scowl spreading across his face.

'Yeah, no offence dude, but you didn't save me from the evil claws of injustice and doom, you know? Nick here did.'

Suddenly, the door to the church opened. The three men span round to face the newcomer, and were surprised to see an old acquaintance.


	4. Chapter 4

'So, where do you think those three have gone?' asked Maya.

'I don't know, pal,' replied Gumshoe, 'off on some exploring thing, I guess.'

'Do you think we should contact them, Mystic Maya, just to make sure they're OK?' asked Pearl, looking up at her cousin, who was holding onto Pearl's left hand.

'I guess we probably should,' Gumshoe agreed, who was holding onto Pearl's right hand. He reached into the pocket of his trench coat, but before he could pick up his phone he got distracted.

'Hey, pal! That cloud looks like a rabbit!'


	5. Chapter 5

Phoenix and Miles stared open-mouthed at the person who had just entered the room, and the newcomer looked just as surprised. The only person who wasn't speechless was Larry.

'So, who is this?' he asked, raising an eyebrow and smiling a mischievous smile.

'You wouldn't be interested in her, Larry,' said Miles, glaring at him, 'she's not a model who's going to dump you within a week.'

'No, she's not. Last I heard of her, she was a lunch lady and an ex-detective who had about three or four boyfriends,' said Phoenix.

'That's right. This boyfriend, that boyfriend, and the other boyfriend,' said Angel Starr sweetly, 'the position for yet another boyfriend is still open,' she added, batting her eyelids at Larry.

'Consider it filled,' beamed Larry.

Angel smiled and shook her head.

'Like I'd go for a loser like you. I'm not desperate, you know.'

'Why does everyone say that?!' sobbed Larry, crying into Miles' shoulder, 'Why, Edgey, why?'

Miles shrugged him off, and turned his attention to Angel.

'So, why are you here? What's been happening since Lana's trial?'

'Long version or short? No, don't answer, I can't be bothered to tell the long story anyway. Basically, I got re-recruited, and so did Jake. We're both on this case – but I'm not going to tell you what that is.'

'Surely you can tell the prosecution?' said Miles with a smile, looking at his vibrating phone, 'Because that's me, now.'

'Um…then I'm the defence…kinda…I will, be, anyway…hang on, I just need to go to the Detention Centre…'

Phoenix ran out of the church. A few seconds later he returned, demanding to know the whereabouts of the Detention Centre.


	6. Chapter 6

'We're soaring…flying…to get to the place…to be all that we…can beeeeee…yeah we're trying…yeah we're breaking freeeeeee….ooohhh…'

Rex Stott sang out of tune to his I-Pod. High School Musical was the best thing that ever happened to him – his ambition was now to be the new all-singing, all-dancing, all-acting Zac Efron. Ok, he'd need to work a bit on the vocals – and the acting…and the dancing…but apart from that, he totally had a head start.

A yell from the guard made him jump so suddenly that he yanked the earphones out of his I-Pod.

'You've got a guest,' muttered the sullen guard. The door opened, and I weird guy with a blue suit and spiky hair entered the room.


	7. Chapter 7

'Hey Gumshoe, I think we should call Miles or Phoenix or something, because they said they'd meet us back here but…well, look for yourself. THEY'RE NOT HERE!!'

Maya was not happy. She had come back early to surprise the boys with presents but there was no lawyer or hot-do-seller in sight EVEN NOW – and _now _it was 7pm. They were meant to back _hours _ago.

'They'll be fine,' Gumshoe reassured her, but even he wasn't sure. There was no way that Miles, who hated churches, Phoenix, who got distracted easily, and Larry, who was both, could possibly manage to stay in a church for eight hours. It just _couldn't happen._ The prospect was equal to the possibility of Gumshoe getting promoted to Chief of Police. In other words, incredibly low; incredibly, incredibly, incredibly low.

'I'm sure they'll be fine,' he sighed, staring out of the window melancholically.


	8. Chapter 8

Phoenix had asked Rex to tell his story. He wished he hadn't. It went something like this:

_Well…um…yeah, well…my life started when I was born…well, obliviously it did, but…um…yeah. So I was born and then…well, my mom died and…yeah, then it was me and dad and Aunty Katrina. She must have been cool before the accident…_

'The accident? Tell me.'

_Well, see, my Aunty Katrina got hit by a car about a year before I came about. After that, well, she tried to be nice and get involved and stuff, but it was hard cause she was in a wheelchair, you know? Not much easier now that she's in a coma._

'A coma?'

_Yeah, she's diabetic now – wasn't before, it started about three years ago or something. But she got in a coma cause she was depressed and got an overload of sugar or something like that. I don't really know._

'Anything happen recently?'

_Yeah, a few months ago, my girlfriend, Rowena, dumped me. She was shouting the odds about something to do with…erm… oh yeah, she said I was having an affair with her sister's best mate, Jinx. Can't imagine who told her that. I bet it was that viper Rosamonda._

'Rosamonda?'

_Yeah, my dad's friend. A detective on some case he always goes on about. Some guy died on that day, a defence attorney. His wife was the victim. Something to do with a lift and a nine year old kid._

Phoenix gasped. No way. This couldn't really be coming back to that again.

'What was the man's name?'

_Can't remember._

'Edgeworth?'

_Oh, yeah. That was it. My dad was a bailiff at that case. There were two – his friend, the other bailiff, he was in the lift too. _

'Who did you say was the first victim?'

_The bloke's wife. Emily, or something like that. Sounded more French, though._

This was all Phoenix needed for now. He had to go and find Miles. But he knew he would be taking this case, whatever happened.


	9. Chapter 9

Phoenix and Miles stared open-mouthed at the person who had just entered the room, and the newcomer looked just as surprised. The only person who wasn't speechless was Larry.

'So, who is this?' he asked, raising an eyebrow and smiling a mischievous smile.

'You wouldn't be interested in her, Larry,' said Miles, glaring at him, 'she's not a model who's going to dump you within a week.'

'No, she's not. Last I heard of her, she was a lunch lady and an ex-detective who had about three or four boyfriends,' said Phoenix.

'That's right. This boyfriend, that boyfriend, and the other boyfriend,' said Angel Starr sweetly, 'the position for yet another boyfriend is still open,' she added, batting her eyelids at Larry.

'Consider it filled,' beamed Larry.

Angel smiled and shook her head.

'Like I'd go for a loser like you. I'm not desperate, you know.'

'Why does everyone say that?!' sobbed Larry, crying into Miles' shoulder, 'Why, Edgey, why?'

Miles shrugged him off, and turned his attention to Angel.

'So, why are you here? What's been happening since Lana's trial?'

'Long version or short? No, don't answer, I can't be bothered to tell the long story anyway. Basically, I got re-recruited, and so did Jake. We're both on this case – but I'm not going to tell you what that is.'

'Surely you can tell the prosecution?' said Miles with a smile, looking at his vibrating phone, 'Because that's me, now.'

'Um…then I'm the defence…kinda…I will, be, anyway…hang on, I just need to go to the Detention Centre…'

Phoenix ran out of the church. A few seconds later he returned, demanding to know the whereabouts of the Detention Centre.


	10. Chapter 10

'WHERETHEHELLHAVEYOUBEENWEHAVEBEENGOINGCRAZYOVERYOUIVEBEENHAVINGAPANICATTACKJUSTWHODOYOUTHINKYOUARESTAYINGOUTTHISLATEOHMYGODNOWYOURJUSTGOINGINTOYOURROOMNOEXPLENATIONGODIHATEYOUOHSERIOUSLYMEN!!'

'Gees, calm down, Gumshoe.'

Without another word the three amateur detectives sulked off to their room tiredly – on the way Larry banged into a door twice – where they started to argue about the hammock rota. "I am totally on there way more than you two," and, "You two are picking on me," echoed around the house and bounced off the walls.

When the three hammock-haters resorted to swearing and violence, Gumshoe decided that, for the sake of Pearls, he would have to step in.

"Guys, there's a kid next door," he yelled through the locked door, "I think what you need to calm down is a cup of hot chocolate and a nice long sleep."

"You try to get a nice long sleep on that pathetic excuse for a hammock," yelled a particularly stressed Edgeworth.

However, they tried the idea, and even though the hot chocolate turned out to be Gumshoe's Special Brand Mud, they came to a reasonable conclusion.

"Well, I'm glad to see that you've decided on a fair rota for the hammock," declared Gumshoe.

"Stuff the hammock," said Phoenix, "We're going to a B&B."


	11. Chapter 11

It took a few hours to find a B&B, and by the end of the journey it was already 3 am. The journey itself was not particularly pleasant – twice Phoenix accidentally-on-purpose nearly got Larry's head stuck in the window. His excuse was that things like that happened all the time.

The B&B was grotty, cold, and cheap. The beds were worse than the hammock, but at least they were all equal…

"Your bed is way better than mine!"

"No, it's not!"

"Yes it is! It's got springs!"

And so the argument continued long into the early hours of the morning, until Miles threatened to push Phoenix out of the window. Then, finally, they settled down for five minutes of sleep. However, Larry started sleep talking.

"Naughty naughty melted cheese!"

"Larry, shut it."

"I do not understand this world of cheese."

Miles swore under his breath. Loudly.

"Oh woe, melted cheese be dead!"

Larry woke up soon after in the corridor. He never did learn how he got there.


	12. Chapter 12

In the morning, breakfast was served – melted cheese on burnt toast.

"Ah!" yelled Larry, "The cheese is dripping on me!"

"Naughty naughty melted cheese," muttered Miles. Phoenix burst out laughing, and everyone ended up with a face full of cheese.

"God, this is disgusting," protested Larry as he took a bit of cheese on toast.

"I do not understand this world of cheese," sighed Phoenix dramatically.

Larry stared on at the two lawyers in confusion. Maybe the good old country air had done something to them… something weird.

They were still laughing when Larry finished his breakfast.

"Look guys. Cheese all gone. No more hysterical laughing, thank you very much."

"Oh woe," his companions yelled in unison, "Melted cheese be dead!"


	13. Chapter 13

At nine o'clock they made their way to the church.

"I'm going to text Godot," mumbled Phoenix.

"Why?"

"I feel like it."

**Hey Gdt hws it goin doin a mrdr **

**CAS in wles HWs prsn? P xx**

"What the hell does that even say, Wright?"

"Look, it's pay by letter, right?!"

"What's with the kisses, Nick?"

"Well, you gotta be polite, hey?"

"Are you allowed mobiles in prison, Wright?"

"I don't know."

"Why do you even have his number?"

Miles and Larry found themselves half falling out of a car door. They managed to pull themselves up and glared at Phoenix.

"My personal matters are my own business," claimed their attacker.


	14. Chapter 14

"Welcome, travellers, lay down your heavy burdens," said a sing-song voice from behind the altar, "I am Sister Flora of Dialgar Angyles Church. Can I help you?"

They explained about the murder investigation.

"Ah yes, that poor defenceless man, God let his spirit rest in peace. If I can assist in any way, do tell me. You say you are lawyers on this case. Pray, are you defence or prosecution?"

"Both."

There was a moment of silence. They explained.

"Ah. Now, good sirs, if you don't mind, I have flower arrangements to do. I shall, as they say in the movies, see you in court!"

"Yeah, see you in – hey! Court? You're a WITNESS?!" Phoenix yelled after her, but the young nun just walked on, humming a hymn.

"Leave it, Wright."

"Hey, guys, doesn't that kid remind you of someone?"

Phoenix nodded. A few months ago there had been a case that had brought the three school-friends together once again. That case had involved a young nun of the same age and apparent innocence as Sister Flora. A lot of secrets had been revealed during that short few days, including Miles' pretty good Defence skills – and the secret identity of a certain prosecutor.

"Iris."

"Sorry about that, Wright. I knew you thought that you two were going to get back together – I should have told you about her and Mike Meekins as soon as I found out."

"Yeah, well, we all make mistakes."

"Yeah. Especially Larry."

"I knew that this conversation would lead to Larry."

"STOP PICKING ON ME, GUYS!!"

Before Miles and Phoenix could roll their eyes at Larry's stupidity, he had randomly flicked a rubber band at them. It hit Phoenix on the forehead.

"Ow! Flipping hell, Larry, you could have got my eye out!"

"Stop! Everyone stop moving!"

Larry and Phoenix stared at their commander blankly, but did as he said anyway. Miles picked up the rubber band with a pair of tweezers and nodded his head.

"Just as I thought. Bloodstained."

"Oh my God!" exclaimed the two onlookers.

"Blasphemy!" yelled a voice from the shadows. A man in a white robe with a big wooden cross round his neck shuffled out, glaring at them.

"Erm…we were praying…" Larry said. He was never brilliant at excuses.

"The eleventh commandment: 'Thou shalt not maketh up stupid excuses.'"

A confused Larry tried to remember how many commandments there were in the first place. After a mental struggle, he decided that if this guy was a priest he was probably right.

"Look, we're the lawyers on the case of the murder of Jon Stott. Is it ok if we look around this church, sir?"

"SIR? Dost thou call me sir?! You refer to me as Your Glorious Holiness."

"I thought that was God…" whispered Phoenix, before being elbowed by Miles for his own protection.

"What dost thou whisper? Dost thou not know the fourteenth commandment? 'Thou shalt not whisper in the company of the Glorious Holiness!'"

"Sorry – your Glorious Holiness."

"And what is this talk of Jon Stott? There are much more important matters in this church! Why, the Dialgar Angyles has been taken!"

"Dia what?"

"The statue! The angel that watched over this church! The night before the murder, she disappeared."


	15. Chapter 15

The temporary detectives sat down for a picnic lunch – in the middle of a graveyard.

"This is getting freaky. Not only have we got a million links to DL-6, we also now have a disappearing angel on our hands. You know what this means, lads?" asked Phoenix.

Of course they did. It meant what it always meant.

"Court Record," they muttered simultaneously.

EVIDENCE:

Attorney's badge – my baby. I love it so much.

Magatama – thing that Maya gave me.

The hammock – an annoying substitute for a bed.

The jacket – bloodstained. Belonged to Rex.

Passport – belonged to Rex. Well-travelled.

Rubber Band – bloodstained

Angel Statue – stolen before the day of the murder.

Profiles:

Phoenix Wright – me

Edgeworth – that annoying guy

Larry – the annoying guy sitting next to him

Maya – annoying spirit medium

Pearl – small annoying spirit medium

Gumshoe – Gumshoe is Gumshoe and there's not much more to say – other than he's annoying

Rex Stott – annoying HSM wannabe

Jon Stott – victim.

Katrina – Rex's aunt – in coma. Diabetic. Used to be in wheelchair after accident.

Sister Flora – annoying nun. Looks like Iris…and Dahlia.

Reverend ?? – ANNOYING bloke.

"Not as good as your previous court records, Wright."


	16. Chapter 16

Edgeworth climbed the hill. He knew this day would come.

There, in the middle of the graveyard, was the man he was looking for. He was trying to stop a food-fight between two other men.

"Miles," said Edgeworth.

Edgeworth faced Edgeworth, brother faced brother. It had taken seventeen years.

"Milo…uh…so, how've you been?"

It may not have been the usual reaction of a long lost brother, but it was a reaction all the same. It was good enough.


	17. Chapter 17

"I haven't been doing much. I work at this post office down the road, I used to be a lodger at Jonny's house – you know, Jon Stott…the victim."

Phoenix nodded. He took another sip of Gumshoe's Special Brand Mud.

"So…Miles. What have you been doing? Last time I saw you, you were just a school kid. I have no idea what you did with your life! Did you become a defence attorney like you always said you would?"

"Not really…I did take one case as a defence attorney when Wright here kind of jumped off a burning bridge… but apart from that, not a defence attorney. I was a defendant once though…"

"Hang on – so what are you doing?"

"…Prosecutor."

Milo stared at his little brother, his mouth wide open, and his eyes full of horror. Had he forgotten those days as a kid, when the two of them would play there imaginary trial games? Miles had been the best defence attorney ever, despising the evil prosecutor, Mr Snuggles.

"Well…that's a surprise…"

"Yeah," said Larry, "Edgey here is one of the best. The Demon Prosecutor, they call him. He's sent lawyers running out of court in tears. It was never about justice, he could win whether the defendant was innocent or not. Completely ruthless, maybe even evil. I'm a bit scared of him, really."

Miles gave him the old you're-really-not-helping-here-Larry glare.

"Is this true, Miles? Have you gone against everything we planned? The plans for Edgeworth and Sons Law Offices – the defence attorneys and a detective? Well? Have you betrayed us, bro?"

"… well…I guess so. I mean, everything Larry said was correct – for once. I was an arrogant, ruthless prosecutor. In fact, just dig my grave a little deeper, I'm going to ask Wright what I said to Adrian Andrews during the Engarde case. Wright?"

"Uh…you probably asked her for her name and occupation – you usually do. Maybe you said, 'My name is Mr Frilly Prosecutor, who are you?'"

"…No. I didn't say that. In fact, you're going to regret thinking that I did. My exact words were: Well, I can't remember my exact words, but it was something about not caring if she committed suicide."

"Was it? Oh, yeah, I remember that. Yeah, that was really funny," chuckled Phoenix. Miles shook his head in despair.

"Miles…bro…you didn't – did you?"

"Yep. I was a naughty naughty melted cheese."

Phoenix and Miles keeled over with laughter. A bowled over brother and freaked out friend stared on with confusion.


	18. Chapter 18

"Trial tomorrow."

"Yeah."

"Larry's quiet. Is he already asleep?"

"Out like a light."

Neither lawyer could sleep. Their nerves had been hit by the electrifying lightening of another case, and they weren't taking it well. The silence of the countryside was a lot louder to the urban warriors than the constant beeping of horns and revving of engines that was their bedtime lullaby at home. The shadows danced maliciously with the same intent of intimidation of Furio Tigre, and the same cold ability to strike fear into hearts as Violetta Cadaverini.

They remained soundless for at least an hour, playing over successes in court in their minds and hoping the same could happen again. Until the silence was broken like a psyche-lock.

"I AM pretty, I am!!"

"Larry, don't start again!"

"Miles, stop it! Phoenix, Miles keeps saying that I'm not pretty!"

The lullaby that sent the two giggling lawyers off to the courtroom of sleep was not an eerie silence, but Larry's version of I Feel Pretty.


	19. Chapter 19

Breakfast involved little conversation and lots of glaring. Miles and Phoenix may have been best friends as children, but they were still rivals in courtroom. Larry only joined in the glaring because he felt left out.

"Larry," said Phoenix, "Me and Miles have something to tell you."

"Oh no," sighed Larry, "I always knew this day would come. Look, guys, I don't mind you being a couple."

An awkward silence followed.

"We aren't a couple. We never have been and we never will be. I know there have been rumours going round, but don't listen to them. It's just Franziska trying to get back at us," said Miles. Larry sighed with relief.

"What we wanted to say is…we think you might have a low self-esteem at the moment, but we just want you to know that though your finest attributes may not be your looks, your skills lie in others areas, like art – and singing, as we discovered last night."

"What Wright is trying to say, Larry, is that … well…I don't think you're pretty, you were right there, but you're good at other stuff too!"

"What the hell are you talking about, guys?"

They shrugged, and continued their breakfast in silence.


	20. Chapter 20

Strangely, the defence lobby looked exactly the same as the one back at home, apart from the picture on the wall, which was of a sheep playing golf. Phoenix stood staring at the picture. He had decided to get a new picture from the wall of Wright & co. and the sheep fitted perfectly. He'd have to ask someone about it later.

"Yo, dude!"

Phoenix nearly jumped out of his skin as he spun around to see who was standing behind him.

"Err…yo…Rex. So, the big trial today. Are you nervous?"

"Dude, totally! So, what the hell are we doing here?"

Phoenix was shocked. His client genuinely didn't know that he was on trial.

"Um…you'll find out later. Just before we start, Rex, I'd like to ask you – what were you doing on the day that your father was killed?"

"The day Dad was killed, huh? It's a bit blurry, really. I was at home watching TV most of the time. But – oh yeah! – the TV broke so I went out for a drive on my mo-ped. I passed the church at, I don't know, about eight-ish. But then I crashed into a tree and had to get a bus back, so I changed route. I think the inn-keeper's daughter, Linda, might have picked it up for me. She likes mechanics, so she might ahev even fixed it for me."

"Which inn would this be?"

"The Griffin."

_That's where we're staying,_ thought Phoenix_, if I manage to get through today I'll have to ask this Linda later._

"Yo, dude!"

"Not another one," muttered Phoenix as he turned around to see what Larry wanted this time.

"So, Nick, am I gonna be your defence aide today?" asked Larry with a massive grin on his face.

"Er… I guess so," Phoenix sighed, his spirits drooping at the thought of his last resort being Larry. It always helped to have a spirit medium at hand to contact Mia. But now all he had was Larry. And he wasn't renound for his excellent mind.

"I guess we'd better be setting up soon," declared Larry, settling into his new role with pride. "I've just been over to the prosecution lobby, and Edgey's already prepared."

"You…went to the prosecution lobby?"

"Err, yeah!"

"What was it like?! I've never been – they don't let defence attorneys in. They say we're too common for the amazing powers of prosecution."

"Well, it was like this place, but more expensive. And without the stupid sheep picture."


	21. Chapter 21

DISCLAIMER: Enter catchy disclaimer here

_Check out _**The DP Analysis Experiment **_on my blog! It'd be appreciated! : ) _

DISCLAIMER: Enter catchy disclaimer here

A short, sharp bang from the gavel announced the beginning of the trial. Everyone sat on the edge of their seats. The news had spread world wide that there was no trial like one with Phoenix Wright on one side and Miles Edgeworth on the other – the wide-eyed spectators were expecting something amazing.

"Is the defence ready?"

"Who can tell? Who is ever ready for what is out there, lurking in the sinister unknown? All we can do is have faith – in ourselves, in our client, in the greater beings who will lead us though life. We cannot truly be ready if we do not know what we are to be ready for. What are we supposed to be preparing ourselves for? Only the winding, on-going roads of fate and destiny can decided that"

Silence echoed throughout the courtroom. Tumbleweed rolled past the witness stand and banged into the prosecution bench – it was as confused as everyone else.

"Oh, sorry! I guess some of Mia's spiritual mumbo jumbo must have rubbed off on me. Yeah, the defence is ready."

"Oh good," said the judge with a sigh of relief, "And the prosecution?"

The silence, even louder than before, hit the roof, came back down again and threatened to sue the court for low ceilings. Phoenix decided to pitch in as the defence attorney.

"On the contrary, your honour," Mr Wright announced with an un-Wright like level of smugness, "The prosecution appears to be…asleep."

"Objection!" muttered Edgeworth in his sleep, "The defence is a small green pinecone! He has no right to cross examine the princess of Marshmallow Land."

"He's not meant to be asleep! He's Miles Edgeworth, the best prosecutor in the country, possibly the world! Top prosecutors like that don't need sleep, they run on guilty verdicts – wake him up, Mr Wright."

"Of course, your honour," said Phoenix with an evil grin as he chucked a marker pen (he would never know why he brought a marker pen to court that day) in the direction of the prosecution bench. It hit him right between the eyes, causing Phoenix to yell, "Bull's-eye," with no traces of couth conduct.

"PINECONES!! Uh…oh…the prosecutions wishes to extend it's most humble apologizes your honour."

"We shall say no more about it. Your first witness, Mr Edgeworth?"

"The prosecution wishes to call Detective Starr to the stand to give us more information on the crime."


	22. Chapter 22

DISCLAIMER: I can't be damn well bothered with disclaimers anymore

DISCLAIMER: I can't be damn well bothered with disclaimers anymore. So this one goes for all the chapters. I _do not_ own the Ace Attorney series. Ok then, is everyone sitting comfortably? Then I'll begin…

"Your name and profession, witness?"

"Angel Starr; I'm the detective in charge of this investigation."

"Detective Starr, please describe the details of this murder."

Using a floor map to assist her, Angel explained that the body had been found at the south end of the nave, in-between the two rear pews. He had died due to blood loss after being stabbed in the back. the time of death had been 10:00 to10:30, April the third. The defendant's jacket and passport had been found on the scene and an eyewitness had seen him fleeing around the time of death.

"Your cross-examination, if you please, Mr Wright," said the judge.

"Larry! That testimony was pretty much flawless from what I can see. Any ideas?"

"Dude, I wasn't listening. I was playing on my phone."

Phoenix listened to the statements over and over, repeating his conversation with Larry every time Angel finished her last statement. He contemplated presenting his Lawyer's Badge at the first statement, but then decided against it. Finally it hit him.

"The victim died due to blood loss after being stabbed in the back…"

"HOLD IT!! Did you find a murder weapon?"

"Um…no."

Commotion spread throughout the crowd of easily excited spectators. Phoenix stood there looking smug, Edgeworth just rolled his eyes, and Larry even glanced up from his phone, missing his chance to get a high score.

"So no murder weapon was found? Did the police search the crime scene thoroughly?"

"Of course! We searched everywhere…well, nearly everywhere."

"Where did you _not_ search?"

"There's a crypt just behind a door from the nave. The body of the founder of the church is kept there. Only certain authorities members of the clergy are permitted entrance." She looked pleased with her vocabulary and batted her eyes at Edgeworth with pride. He didn't seem vey impressed.

"So the weapon could be in there?"

"No, it couldn't. we checked the door and there's no sign of it being opened for years. There is no way the weapon could be in there."

_Which means, judging by my past record, that it is in there_, Phoenix thought. _So, what should I ask about? The contents of the crypt, the entrance to the crypt, or the witnesses favourite colour?_

"Witness! The defence demands to know your favourite colour! No, wait, hang on a minute. Witness! Tell us about the entrance to the crypt!"

"There is one entrance to the crypt, which is the previously mentioned door."

"Add that to your testimony so I can ask you about it!"

"Why do I need to add it to my testimony? Can't you just ask me about it now?"

"No! Add it! Or I'll have to keep talking with exclamation marks!"

"Ok then. There is one entrance to the crypt, which is the previously mentioned door."

"HOLD IT!! Could there be any other entrances?"

"Well, yeah, I guess."

Phoenix went back to his smug grin.

"So the weapon _could_ be in there!"

"Wright, why would the weapon be in there anyway? If the killer wanted to hide it they could have put it anywhere – a lake, a cave, an abandoned barn– all of these are near by!"

"And risk being seen? I doubt it. Just look at this crime pho…hang on, I don't even have a crime photo!"

"I do!" beamed Angel, presenting the photo to the court with glowing pride.

"Thanks! Just what I needed. Anyway, look at this wound and the amount of blood. It seems to me that the murder weapon was probably quite big."

"Objection! Can you prove that?" asked Edgeworth, that dooming question that always got in the way of Phoenix's theories.

"No, I can't, but I think I know someone who can."

"I think I know who you think can."

"I think you _do_ think who I think can."

"Wright, you're just getting childish now. The court calls the eye witness to the stand – Milo Edgeworth."


	23. Chapter 23

**It would really help if I could remember anything about this story. Ah, well. In celebration of getting the new Miles Edgeworth game today, I am returning after a long absence :)**

* * *

Milo Edgeworth took the stand. He was slightly taller than his brother, and his hair was longer and in a ponytail. Other than that, however, they were incredibly similar – the same chiselled face, the same weary eyes.

He stared at Miles with a pleading look, as if begging him to bring an end to this joke, to say, "Actually, Milo, I'm really a defence attorney. I'm going to go over to the other side of the courtroom now and stop playing about. Come on, Payne, come take the prosecution bench."

But Miles didn't say that. Instead, without any recognition in his voice of his brother, he continued with the speech he gave to every witness.

"Please state your name and profession for the court."

"Milo Edgeworth. I work at a post office down the road."

Edgeworth nodded. This was instruction enough for Milo to know he was to begin his testimony. He seemed to understand the procedures of the court well.

"It was April the third, about ten o'clock. I was walking by the church when I heard some commotion inside. I went to check it out to see what was going on. On entering, I saw Rex Stott standing over the victim's body."

_Damn_, Phoenix thought. _Another watertight testimony. I won't ask Larry as I can see he's pretty absorbed in that game. Time to think for myself._


	24. Chapter 24

_It was April the third, about ten o'clock._

**Hold it!** Was it really?!

_Yes._

… Alright then.

_I was walking by the church when I heard some commotion inside._

**Hold it!** Why were you walking by the church?!

_The church is in between my house and the post office where I work. I stayed late on that night to unpack some boxes of greeting cards, and I was walking home._

Greeting cards, eh?

_Yes._

… Alright then.

_I went to check it out to see what was going on._

**Hold it! **Why did you go in? It could have been dangerous.

_If no-one ever risked anything, Mr Wright, we'd live in a very dull and pointless world._

… You're not related to anyone called Godot, are you?

_Not as far as I know._

… Alright then.

_On entering, I saw Rex Stott standing over the victim's body._

**Hold it! **Was the victim dead?

_Yes._

… Alright then.

"Larry!" Phoenix hissed, slapping his friend on the hand so hard that he dropped his phone. "What are we going to do? I've got nothing on this testimony, but there must be a flaw. Think, Larry, think!"

"I dunno. Just go onto the next witness."

Phoenix stared at him blankly for a few moments before yelling "Eureka!", hugging him, and turning back to the court with a grin.

"Mr Edgeworth."

"Yes?" replied the two brothers in unison.

"… You know, if this was a story, that would have made a rubbish joke. Anyway, Mr … Witness. Did you see anyone else in that church?"

"No."

"Then how do we have another witness?"

Miles made to object, but Milo stopped him with a wave of his hand. He looked Phoenix right in the eyes and shook his head with a chuckle.

"Do you never think, Mr Wright? Just because someone sees you doesn't mean you see them."

Phoenix stared at him blankly.

"You'll see," Milo said. "Call the next witness!"

"Hey!" Miles interrupted, "I call the witnesses."

The judge shook his head, banged his gavel and called the witness himself.


	25. Chapter 25

"**Objection!**" Phoenix suddenly yelled, flailing his arms and accidently hitting Larry in the face. "Have we forgotten why we called Mr Edgeworth to the stand in the first place?

Judging by the resounding silence, everyone had.

"It was to discover what the murder weapon was!"

"The murder weapon?" Milo's face seemed to grow ever so slightly paler. _Ah! _Phoenix thought, _progress at last_.

"Alright then, Mr Wright," said the judge, chuckling slightly as what he thought was a rather impressive pun. "Mr Edgeworth, please testify to the court about the murder weapon."

"Your honour, a testimony won't be neccessary here," Milo said with all the coolness of his brother. "I have no idea about the murder weapon. I didn't see it."

"Ah, well, we may as well just call the next witness then-" began the judge, raising his gavel.

"**Objection!**" Phoenix interrupted. "Judge, are you out of your mind?! No, strike that line, it doesn't bode well for my case. Witness, how can you have stumbled across a crime scene and not seen the weapon?"

"**Objection!**" Miles cried. "The murder weapon could have been hidden before the witness entered the scene."

"**Objection!** So why was the murderer standing over the body?"

"**Objection! **The murderer could have been contemplating how to cover up his evil deed. And anyway, I think Mr Wright is getting a bit fond of yelling objection."

"**Objection! **Yelling objection is very satisfying."

"**Obje**-"

At this point the judge banged his gavel and insisted the squabbling stop and the next witness be called.


End file.
